Vacations end and so do prayer vacations. Usually, upon ending a vacation, you might feel refreshed, yet when you return to your work and your daily life, you find yourself playing catch-up, trying to complete the work that piled up while you were gone on vacation. But my prayer vacation has been different and I don't feel refreshed, and I don't feel the need to play catch up. In fact, I may decide to continue my prayer vacation awhile longer because it was so good.
One of the things I noticed is that I pray constantly throughout the day. I don't stop, close my eyes, fold my hands and pray formally, but I'm in almost constant running conversation with God all day long. What I am not sure of is whether or not he listens or hears my prayers, because on his end of the conversation, he's pretty quiet. But I found myself 'thinking' a thought at God, and then I'd say, oh yeah, I'm on vacation and I would cut off the thought midway. This happened repeatedly to the point that it became annoying.
The world didn't change because I stopped praying. Good things happened and bad things happened. Among the good things that happened is that Rachel got a job that makes her happy. I've been praying about that for four years now, so I find it amusing that she finally gets a job when I stop praying. My legs and feet didn't swell for a few days and I was able to go for a walk, and do some chores. That's a really good thing. Bad things happened too. Vern lost his job, but was immediately presented with an opportunity that may prove to be very beneficial to him, or not. My good friend Brad was rushed to the hospital and took a big hit on his recovery from botched knee surgery. An acquaintance with cancer whom I had prayed for had one pain-free, good day followed by a really bad day. My sweet niece discovered a lump in her breast. That one destroyed me for a few days. My Mom had to relinquish most of her freedom and independence and begin relying on a caregiver. And last, but not least my neighbor Anthony, who I really like, came over and told me that he had gone to the doctor and found out he has high blood pressure. We ended up talking for awhile about God, prayer, prison, drugs, health, belief, unbelief. I desperately wanted to pray for him, but I didn't. On a prayer vacation it would be wrong to pray. But I'll pray for him now that it's over.
Surprising was the number of people who asked me to pray for them during my prayer vacation. It was difficult for me to show love and concern for them without agreeing to pray for them. Most times I just tried to ignore their requests altogether. I found that I really despise those people that post to Facebook and ask for prayers and "healing thoughts". Really? Please, either pray, or don't, but never ever send me healing thoughts. Keep your thoughts to yourself. Prayer may be frustrating, but at least it involves a good God who can actually DO something. Healing thoughts are kind of like spraying Glade air freshener over dog poop. No thank you.
I did break my prayer vacation once to discuss my niece with God. I also skipped going to church for two reasons: 1) My legs were swollen and I wanted to sit in my easy chair; and 2) Why go to church when you won't pray anyway? It seemed like a useless, meaningless thing to do.
So the world goes on whether I pray or not. I really miss talking with God when I'm on prayer vacation. And it was really, really nice to forget mine and everybody else's troubles for a few days and just know that God was going to take care of it all. It's wonderful to believe without feeling compelled to act. I enjoyed being a person who doesn't pray. I enjoyed it enough that I may extend my prayer vacation a little longer.
Oh, one of the weirdest experiences of all was running into a lady at the grocery store who watching me walk realized that I had cerebral palsy. Her son also has the disease which I think probably opened her eyes to recognize my gait and my tight muscles. We were talking about CP, and her son, and then she just outright tells me that she's a believer, and that it is her dream to see God heal everyone on earth from this horrible palsy. I told her that I had a similar dream and desire, and then for some reason I don't understand I asked her to pray for me. She said, "Right here and now? In front of everybody?" I said, "Yes. Who's going to care? I don't." So she put her hand on my shoulder and we bowed our heads and she asked the Lord to heal me and her son and everyone else from CP. I tried not to listen to her because she started using phrases such as, "If it be your will." But I love her faith and I love her boldness, and I loved her expression of shock when I asked her to pray for me in the store. So technically that was also a breech of my prayer vacation, but it was a wonderful and lovely breech. Her name was Nancy, and I gave her my phone number. I hope I talk to her again. And no, I'm not healed...yet. But it was very cool.
So ends the prayer vacation that really wasn't.
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